TRUST
STRENGTH
DIVORCE
How
can you be free to become all God is trying to make you if you give away parts
of yourself to others? If you don't feel free enough in ANY situation to say
"no", and walk away, then you are not acting as 100% of yourself.
"The freedom to walk away, is the freedom that lets you stay."
The layers of "induction" applied by the world, must be peeled away,
until we feel the freedom, if regretfully, to pass the death sentence on our
child or parent.
This freedom comes from nowhere but God. A caveat : or anything that gives one
complete mastery of the fear of death. Only those willing to give their lives
have the strength to walk away in ALL situations, even life threatening.
Of course, without a context, the above statements won't stand. The only item
of context that's needed here, is that your action of walking away will clearly
be pointed in God's direction.
Having said all that, I now say that divorce for spiritual reasons in not the
first consideration. Except in the case of known Satan worship. By spiritual, I
mean whether or not the partner is "saved" or goes to church, or does
any other religious practices. If you think your spouse is going to hell, and
you think you can't live with someone like that, think again.
The first consideration in ALL relationships is Trust. The point of the
upturned Pyramid of Relationship is Trust. All other elements of a relationship
flow out of Trust. You might be able to say that the amount of bonding in a
relationship is directly proportional to the amount of trust. The closer two
people are, the more Trust will be evident. I hope you can see that two people
can have a very good, trusting relationship without ever bringing God into it.
Now, having said that, I want to clarify further the spiritual reason for
divorce. I said that you can't be free to become all God is trying to make you
if you give away parts of yourself to others. We need to see this from a
different angle. We need to look at the ways we give in to others, to see that
the giving in is keeping us away from some legitimate spiritual pursuit.
It's OK to live with someone who "isn't saved", as long as they fully
respect your spiritual walk. In reality, a partner worth keeping will be found
giving voluntarily support to the believer.
Some folks get trapped into thinking that their partner is spending too much
time in spiritual pursuits, or will be weaned away from the marriage by some
twisted doctrine. Such is the case with the Moonies. This can't happen with
Christianity. Remember, the more of yourself you give to others the less of
yourself you are. The object of God's training is to strip away all the places
in our lives where we've depended on other people. It's through dependence on
God that we learn that He will really take care of us. True Christianity will
give a person the strength to love openly. That strengthens, not divides a
relationship. God wants ALL our dependence to be on Him.
Let's not jump to the usual idea that we must give God 100% of our lives, and
then sit static because the task is so overwhelming. Let's say that, when ever
it is that we need to depend on other than ourselves, we choose God. That's a
whole lot easier. We can accomplish that sometimes. In fact, it allows us to
construct situations where we can put our dependence on God. And I'm not
talking about "tempting God."
I don't mean to jump off a ten story building to see if God will keep His
promise of protection. I'm talking about scripturally sound practices: tithing,
communion, fasting. These are all faithing acts, and put God "on the
dime." We don't have to guess if God will honor our action. He's bound by
His word; at least up until today. Up until today, I have never heard God
change His mind about tithing. He even reinforced the practice through Jesus'
own words when he told the Pharisees that they were right to tithe. They were
just wrong on practically everything else. God changed His mind concerning the
bloodline inheritance of the High Priest Eli, but He hasn't nullified
communion.
Trusting God leads directly to trusting others, in an ever expanding circle.
When one understands that God is at hand, the fear of someone breaking trust
with us is no longer threatening. This is another way to look at what I
mentioned above about being able to walk away.
The 100% Christian, not us, that's only Christ, doesn't take personally what
others do. Jesus manifested this behavior from the cross when he asked God to
forgive his murderers. And oddly enough, this works exactly the same, in a very
unexpected way.
Jesus could have looked down from the cross and said, "I'm dying, one
result of which will be your salvation, but don't take it personally." I
guess that raises some mental eyebrows, huh? This is one of those examples
that's so far out on the spectrum that it sounds impossible, but consider. Just
like God, people do things for their own reasons. Therefore, we can't take
personally anything that others do. Let's look at Jesus again.
He didn't choose to go to the cross so that he might be the agency of our
salvation. He went to the cross because God asked him to; and promised to raise
him up again after three days. Jesus' crucifixion was first, an act of obedience.
I'm sure glad that we got saved in the bargain, but that wasn't Jesus' primary
reason for choosing death. You may remember his prayer in the garden. He said
that he'd done everything God told him to. He "finished" the work.
Selah!
A relationship that fosters Trust will endure, in or out of the God-frame.
Trust in God, without hindrance, will increase the opportunities for partners
to Turst. And Trust ultimately leads to God. How? By confirming and adding
individual strength to a person. You see, as a person trusts, and gains a bit
more strength, they come a little farther away from the fears that influence
their lives. There comes a point in this trust-strength building process that
allows the person to accept, the reality of the supernatural, and, the
responsibilities of a relationship with God. A person must be able to walk away
from their own lives. This means preferring the God-way over ALL others, when
the decision time comes. One may or may not be put in a position to give up
their physical lives. The underlying principle of Preference must apply to all
actions.
Notice that specific actions can be different for people. Some people feel no
God-guilt for smoking cigarettes. Others couldn't say the S-word if they had a
mouthful. With Christianity, it's not what you do, it's how you do it. When a
person's smoking is clearly interfering with their spiritual walk, it's time to
quit; in which case I'm sure God would help. The fundamental key is, "Does
it get in the way?"
We must be able to walk away from any life situation that puts a wedge between
us and God. Walking away takes strength. Faithing builds strength.
Faithe.